The TR: Are You Even IN Your Office Right Now? Didn't Think So.

Ready for the 4th? We figure that the entire city is off on their vacation plans already, except for those forlorn few trapped in the office right now. Our Culture Minister feels your pain. We hope you can leave soon -- fireworks, hot dogs, BBQ and the pool are calling your name!

Enjoy these juicy TR tidbits -- just like Mom used to make.

The Tr Lite: Freedom Edition

MJ, MJ, MJ! The King of Pop's death has crashed the news cycle this week, and taken Iran/the economy/any other celebs/everything else with him. The latest:

• Autopsy reports are all over the Internet, and it ain't pretty.
  
• MJ will be laid to rest on Tuesday in LA.
  
• Best way to immortalize an icon? Butter.
• Coverage on the morning shows: definitely not going away any time soon.
• OK! Magazine paid a cool half mill to use "the death photo" on their cover. Bad taste, but you clicked, huh?
• You'll click on this one, too: Rush Limabugh is an ass. The Daily Show, actually, had a great round-up of some of the worst MJ coverage by journalists, so, hey, click that too!
  
• Among other news, Barack still has MJ on his ipod. Phew.

ANYWAY. Aside from that, things actually happened in the world this week. We know! We were surprised too!

Hey, South Carolina! Did you accept Sanford's apology? We heard the words "self-serving" and "bullshit" were appropriate. His wife thought so too, and she deserves the props (and WOW, we hate linking to this but listen to some of the bs Michael Wolff is spewing about her). Look, blah blah blah, scandal, infidelity -- we wrote about it last week, we mentioned it this week, we're done, okay? No more Sanford. We're bored. Go back to Maria, take care of your sons and call it a DAY.

North Korea is celebrating the Fourth of July early! H'ray! Wait... what?

Everyone is unemployed. We mean, you knew that, but now it's confirmed. And it's all Obama's fault!

Now, okay, everyone knows that pulling out is not always a great plan. (Take that one how you like, folks.) But the US pulling out of Iraq's major cities? We'll take it. Say hi to Papa Joe and George Stephawhatever for us!

This is from last week, and made the Twitter rounds already, but LOL! Stoned wallabies!

In Other News You Forgot Was Still Happening, it's FRANKEN.

The quickest scandal we ever did see: first the WashPo was offering a pay-for-access dinner; then everyone freaked out; then they weren't. Bam. Well done, all.

Finally, in local news, the Real World-ers are moving in, and the stalkers/haters are on it. If you're into the DC blog scene, expect to hear more about their every move, and then wonder why you care.

PS: Don't. Forget. About. Iran.

Scorecard

So that's it. Maybe we missed something, but you know what? We're outta here. Tell us what we missed and we'll, um, read it.

Here's a handy list of ALLLLLL the fun things you can do around here this weekend. And be careful with those fireworks, people. THIS IS WHAT COULD HAPPEN. For serious. Don't Sanford it.

Have a GREAT holiday!

The TR: RIP MJ, Sanford's Tan Lines and Total Twitter Twoverload

Did your Internets collapse under the weight of all the news this week? Goodness gracious! We haven’t had such an exciting time with our Google Readers since... well... actually, that sounds kind of dirty. Never you mind. Read on for sex scandals, celebrity deaths (real AND fake), Palin’s attempts at staying relevant and lots of “getting Gibbs wet” jokes from the press. They were DYING to write those headlines, we’re sure.

Forecast

FYI, y’all, Congress is going into recess today. Probably recovering from the first-ever White House Luau; we found loads of stories about dunk tanks, Sasha’s awesome throwin’ arm (Title IX, people!) and, OMG, the most adorable Barack/Michelle moment ever. Where was our invite, Obama? Nevermind -- Queenie and her princes are off frolicking on the REAL beach. Hah.

Anyway, bipartisanship gets a brand new test at the RNC v. DNC softball spectacular tonight. Love, love, LOVE the trash talk.

The name "Neda" has been on everyone's lips since the young woman's death was broadcast all over the web this week, but we're worried that she and the election in Iran will get overshadowed by all the other news this week and next. Read this amazing piece from the Women's Media Center about how Neda became a symbol, and keep looking for more stories as Obama takes a firmer stance.

The California budget crisis will soon be solved! How? They are RUNNING OUT OF MONEY. State Comptroller John Chiang plans to "start issuing IOUs next week to local governments, private contractors, state vendors, and to taxpayers awaiting tax refunds.” That’s the way to fix the struggling economy -- leave all of those who have done business with the state hanging, so they in turn can’t pay employees or even their own utility bills!

Remember that whole “there’s a war going on” thing? The US military is preparing for a withdrawal by June 20th (that’s next Tuesday), and attacks are ramping up. But some people don’t believe we’ll even get a withdrawal.

Bernie Madoff's sentencing is next week! Place your bets now!

Sarah Palin is trying to stay afloat as the GOP's number one contendah, but so far she's just staying outraged as people take digs at her (wait, she made a joke!). Sigh. This will get old fast.

Dear summer interns: you know we love you. We know your parents have told you this, and you’re probably so tech savvy you don’t need the advice, but be careful what you Tweet. Marion Berry is watching.

The Week That Was

SEX SCANDALS! LIES! TAN LINES! Just a day in the life of American politics, dearies. And for all you naysayers out there -- we’re sorry, both Republicans AND Democrats are screwing around and getting caught. We love Andrea Dew Steele’s take on all this, though: what if Nancy Pelosi skipped off to another country on Mother’s Day to get some extra-marital attention? Would a press conference and some tears get the media off her back that quickly? Weeeee don’t think so... hell, Sanford's already back at work.

Didn't these "gay demon" fearing Christians know that exorcism only works if the actual dude from "The Exorcist" is in the room? Kidding aside, we really hope the kid in this video is ok.

Other scandals this week? Perez Hilton. LOL! This started as welcome comic relief for us AND Zac Efron (hmmm... Hollywood feeding itself its own entertainment...) but it's turning something a bit more serious. Here's the rundown: gay blogger gets punched by music exec after insulting him with a gay slur. Gay blogger sues and tries to donate money to Matthew Shepard Foundation. Foundation refuses because he used a gay slur. Kelly Clarkson pretty much summed it up here.

Are race relations any better under Obama? Most people are saying no (and the Transformers movie, which our Culture Minister highly recommends viewing on the big, big, BIG screen, is a shining example). What do YOU think? (On a related note, our marketing intern found this gem of a website that will teach you how to treat your white colleagues in the work place. Phew! Finally, someone tells us!)

Here, this will make you laugh: Meghan McCain thinks she's a pundit. Teehee!

In Memoriam, Red Line and Red Carpet Edition

What. A. Week.

First, the biggest tragedy in Metro's history. We're sure you heard (or maybe were there) when there was a crash on the Red Line this week, and we're sure your friends across the country were Tweeting/emailing/calling you within minutes. Our hearts go out to the victims and their families.

Then Our Culture Minister yesterday was shocked to hear people shouting “MICHAEL JACKSON DIED!” into their Blackberries as she walked to Farrugut West. After some quick texting, it was confirmed: au revoir, Roi de la Pop.

WTF, man? We’re as upset as the rest of you. And MJ Tweets were 30% OF THE TWITTERSPHERE this morning; all 10 of CNN’s top stories were, yep, about MJ; Google, Bing, Twitter, TMZ, Perez, the LA Times -- hell, the internet broke, you guys. Talk about star power. We'll miss you, MJ.

And this on top of Ed Macmahon’s and Farrah Fawcett’s real deaths, AND Jeff Goldblum’s and Harrison Ford’s fake deaths. (Oh, and death of Perez Hilton’s popularity, but that’s, like, whatever.)

Scorecard

We're doing our best to keep these Report's comin', people. See how we love you? That said, next week there's a three-day-weekend, and we don't love you that much. Take a break for some fireworks and we'll see you soon!

The TR: Democracy in Iran, Feeding the iPhone Frenzy and Red Carpets in DC

It's been a busy, busy, busy week. We mean, you HAVE been checking your Twitter lately, right? (And, by the way, did you know you can follow The Turner Report on Twitter?) From massive protests in Iran to star-sightings in DC, we have the global scoop this week. You might want to sit down for this one...

Forecast

Healthcare has remained one of the many, many above-the-fold issues this week, and it'll stay that way for the near future. Haven't kept up? Check out the Dummy's Guide. O sought out the AMA's support for his reform plans, but Senate Democrats are putting the breaks on as they try to hash out the costs -- and Republicans are already shoutin' some fightin' words. This is going to be a long and painful process, folks. Next week, check out O's healthcare forum on ABC and tell us if the Republicans are right in warning that it'll be an infomercial.

More on Congress' plate this week: energy! Well, it's been there all the time, but now we're paying attention. Energetically, natch. The cap and trade bill is hitting the floor next week -- maybe -- and while Democrats argue about the specifics, we and the enviros around here are hoping this will finally happen. Oh, and that "cash for clunkers" bill passed -- fuel efficiency for the win!

However, a Republican senator really pissed us off with this one: a resolution condemning violence against health providers was blocked anonymously -- and why, do you ask? Let RH Reality Check explain.

Is the economy fixed yet?! These two graphs show positive growth. Go ahead and read the rest of this article for us, though, 'cause we are waaay too busy for this kind of eco-jargon.

Bushie is lashing out again -- just in time for more news about the rest of the Republican Party's implosion. Is he just trying to provide a distraction, or is he just bored? We dunno, but we hope he'll go back to the ranch soon... they need him out there.

We figure that most of you are already on top of this, but in News-That-Makes-Us-Pee-A-Little, the new iPhone is here! Yay! Oh, and the new Google Phone. Whatever THAT is...

The Week That Was

We hope you've been paying as much rabid attention to the situation in Iran as we have. Nico Pitney has been liveblogging the election fall-out from the Huffington Post; check it out for videos, pictures, quotes, articles and more. Here's more from Guardian. A special shout-out to the Lipstick Revolution -- Iranian women have been taking to the streets by the thousands to fight for equal rights. And another shout-out to Jared Cohen from the State Department, who, as We Love DC pointed out, was key in keeping the Fail Whale away from election coverage. But remember, kiddos -- we love Twitter, we love social media, but 140 characters and a green avatar doth not a revolution make.

More on Iran: Facebook and Google offering Persian translation; the House bill condemning the violence against the demonstrators; Iranian soccer players that joined in the protests suspended; and Pete Hoekstra Tweets a terrible simile that's now an awesome meme.

Ooh, get well soon, Hillary! And you too, Walter Cronkite.

Hey, y'all, here's the Sotomayor WTF of the Week! And one more, just for good measure.

Many people have been describing the "honeymoon with Obama" as fully over, and, in an ironic move, Bill Maher has added himself to the list with his recent screed. What do you think? Do you agree?

OMG CELEBS! DC is red-carpet friendly this week: Angie was here for World Refugee Day, they're filming a Reese Witherspoon/Owen Wilson/Paul Rudd movie around town and people are still pissed off about Real World DC and The Real Housewives. We're cool, you guys! Right? (Hey, at least we have Ovechkin -- MVP, baby!)

Also, two more must-sees from our Culture Minister: something to make you giggle and something to make you cry. Whew -- emotional rollercoaster!

Scorecard

We'll close with a hearty round of Limbaugh Karaoke and this awesome photo of our own Jen Dickson, Morning Joe and Mika B. Really!

Didja make your plans for July 4 yet? Invite us over -- we make a mean red, white and blue jello mold.

Have a great weekend!

The TR: Hate, Healthcare and Hot Air

Tragic geriatric killing chez Holocaust, swine flu (aka heiny virus) once again on the rampage, and the Queenie agrees with Palin... quelle horreur! It really MUST be the end of the world as we know it...

Forecast

It's all healthcare, all the time as the pressure builds to create some legislation. Although we'll see movement on food safety and climate change, healthcare will own the airwaves and Obama will keep on keepin' on in the heartland. Elsewhere on the agenda: wartime supplemental and "cash for clunkers."

Although he's got quite a bit on his plate, Obama is staying focused: he will publicly pledge to do something about immigration reform! ...Even if, you know, no real action can come to pass until at least 2011. Let's see if Repubs grab the chance to win the Hispanic vote back.

Speaking of backlash, the debate over Sotomayor has not let up -- even if it's notsomuch in the news. The Senate has been boiling over with juvenile name-calling and in-yo-face debating. Geez... she's not even THAT liberal! Maybe, as our good friend PunditMom asks, she's just got cooties? Well, at least Bushie is sticking up for her.

We'll continue to see stories over the weekend about the connections between abortion clinic terrorists and white supremacists (thank you, Southern Poverty Law Center). And, of course, the more tenuous connection between the poisonous right-wing media environment and violence (thank you, Media Matters). Both good and important points. But, apparently, the right wing media is up in arms because the anti-Semitic shooter was actually an extreme lib: exhibit A -- he was off to shoot up the Weekly Standard, and B -- he hated Bush. Crazy people are just damned crazy, and many paranoids just hate everyone. (And - interesting Web 2.0 note - most of his rants were quietly removed from websites across the country in the last few days.)

Regulating tobacco? It's headed for Obama's desk. But there's plenty a slip 'twixt cup and lip. So let's hope they give the poor FDA some big mooolah, too, since the agency is already too underfunded to do its existing work and will soon have gigantic new (needed) food safety obligations. We're not seeing enough attention to the unfunded mandate detail. AND we keep thinking of Grover Norquist's 1990's call to make government so small it can be drowned in the bathtub. How about giving it too much to do, not giving it enough money, then industry can say they'd do a better job policing themselves? Aaaah, and THEN the bathroom scenario. Scary.

Queenie is getting really tired of comedians in the news. Oh, no, newly almost-minted Senator Franken of Minnesota, we don't mean you. But, please. Davie-boy, it isn't cute to joke about 14-year-old's sex lives. But, you certainly nailed the media monsoon the Palins would help you generate with that line. As great as that may be with your O'Brien/Stewart face off... BAD BOY. Down. Heel. (Sadly, it ain't over -- it will be the gift that keeps on giving as Palin [correctly, Queenie thinks] continues to demand an apology to women. Oops! There it is!)

The Week That Was

In News-That-Seems-Obvious, swine flu is now a pandemic. Click here if you have no idea what that means.

Ahmadinejad or Mousavi? Iranians have been voting today in mass numbers, and the Guardian had spiffy live updates to keep us informed. Check 'em out. What do you think -- is Obama right when he says Iran is ripe for change?

Sanctions on North Korea have been expanded as a result of their nuclear tests, and *yawn* we're back in the cycle. As a result, South Korea and, indeed, the US are gearing up for more tests -- and this on the heels of hearing that Kim Jong Il's successor will be his youngest son. We told you to pay attention to this stuff, remember?

It's D-Day! Time to make sure your TV is ready for digital signals -- and if you haven't heard about this by now, you're probably not on e-mail either. So we guess we can say whatever we want about you senile, uncultured troglodytes. Zing!

The Army is allowing soldiers to use social networking sites, reversing a longstanding policy on U.S. bases, and we're applauding them for the move. Not only is it giving the Army a chance to create its own PR (hear the "Army story" straight from the source) but it gives soldiers even more of a chance to connect with their friends and family while on base. Although, still no MySpace or YouTube. As long as they can tweet!

Carrie Prejean was fired! Go ahead, breath that sigh of relief -- the great Miss America institution is saved. Ok, ok, this isn't really that interesting... but the emails dug up between her and Miss California director Keith Lewis are hilarious.

OMG OMG OMG! It's only a few hours until you can have your Facebook vanity url. Our Culture Minister has been practicing for the quickdraw all week. (Don't know why this is important? Might want to hire us for some online tech training...)

Announcement

School's out for summer! This may not be a staple of cablefest rants next week, but it IS top of mind for most of the rest of the country: "WHAT THE H*** DO WE DO WITH THE KIDS NOW????" So... another tragic announcement... in the decision between "my royal princes" OR "regular weekly TR?" It's OFF WITH THE TURNER REPORT'S HEAD.

We will be publishing the TR semi-regularly this summer and focusing on Turner's real work -- creating kick-a** traditional and online media campaigns that change the world for the better. OH YES, with a dab of parenting thrown in. (Want to send the kids over to play Xbox at the Queen's castle on K Street? They can wave to Sascha and Malia in the White House kiddie play room.)

Oh, don't cry. Here, our Culture Minister will cheer you up with this awesome rap video about Arlington -- you know, the only place you snobby Washingtonians will visit in sweet Virginia.

We'll be seeing you!

The TR: Obama's Noms, the Royal Wii and the Future of the Middle East

SotomayOR, SotomayOR, SotomayOR. Is the first Latina SCOTUS judge nominee a racist... or does she just have PMS? On a less serious note, Jon & Kate has America enthralled. Read on for the dramz and the LOLz! Or, if that's too much for you, annoy your co-workers and celebrate Sesame Street's 40th anniversary with these cute clips. Ah, memories...

Forecast

Obama nom'd Sonia Sotomayor for the Supreme Court, and Puerto Rico exploded. We mean... the Republican party. We mean... the Internet. O probably thought he was gonna win some conservatives over by choosing someone with an ambiguous stance on abortion, but who can ever tell what those right-wing wackos will do? (Like this gem, which warns against Sotomayor's potential PMS. Yeah. Really.) Check out this piece on Newt Limbaugh's "white man's burden" and grab the movie snacks as the GOP continues through the remaining stages of grief up to her confirmation (which we think is a thumbs up).

Oh, and as if SCOTUS isn't already all over the wires, the detainee abuse photos are coming to the high court. Watch out for more on this, dears.

There were protests all over the country when California upheld Prop 8 this week, and while they are allowing the marriages already performed to remain valid, we, along with many others, say: *middle finger*. It's a basic civil right, and here's hoping people can get it together enough to realize that. Knowing that most of the country opposes gay marriage, however, makes it even tougher. Read here for an update on the current state of gay marriage in the country, and for a look at upcoming hurdles.

North Korea's missile testing isn't a crisis yet, according to SecDef Gates. "What we do have, though, are two new developments that are very provocative, that are aggressive, accompanied by very aggressive rhetoric." So much so that Chinese fishing boats have started to evacuate. So will this blow up into yet another international crisis, or remain under the radar? Keep an eye on this, all, as Gates & Co. head off to talk security in the region soon.

Palestinian President Mahmoud Abbas came to the Oval Office last week to discuss the future of the West Bank, and while we're seeing the new administration's efforts to revitalize the conversation, it's most likely a no-go. Obama will be traveling to Europe and the Middle East next week, so expect coverage of his speech from Cairo.

Also on the travel agenda? The 60th anniversary of D-Day - but who forgot to invite the Queen? It's okay; she'll probably be busy playing MarioKart, anyway (to which our Culture Minister says, "Me too!"). Check out this awesome picture of Queen Elizabeth's Golden Wii (we've been waiting all our lives to type that sentence, folks).

The Week That Was

Obama was IN California last week, and Lt. Dan Choi, who was dismissed from the National Guard based on his orientation under Don't Ask, Don't Tell, came as close as he could to tell Obama that the policy should be overturned. Check out the vid, and see Dan's second interview with Rachel Maddow here.

Bushie came out of hiding this week in Michigan, and avoided talking trash. Nice for him.

Fort Campbell, in Kentucky has seen a rash of suicides lately and closed down for three days for a "suicide stand-down training event." We agree with John Eskow on this one: we need to take care of soldiers, and not only on Memorial Day. This is a small step.

NASA is now being operated by 7 year olds -- and you know what? We're okay with it.

Jon & Kate + 8 -- you know, that couple with the kids or whatever -- have been all over the news lately in wake of their marriage troubles and season premiere. Now they're being investigated with regards to child labor laws. Wow. This country sure loves a trainwreck, no? We say, get those kids off the air and get those parents some therapy.

Is this Burger-Gate 2? Did he order mustard? WERE THERE FRENCH FRIES INVOLVED?! We can't wait to see where he'll show up next. Hey, Obama! There's a Starbucks, like, IN our building! Or we can try Subway -- DC does have a reputation to uphold, after all.

In other food news, the Canadian Governor General, and we quote, gutted "a freshly slaughtered seal, [pulled] out its heart and [ate] it raw." Don't care why she did it. EWWWW.

In Memoriam... ish

Super top secret alert: Top newspaper execs and publishers met privately to figure out WTF to do after they totes misjudged the significance of the web -- and now, um, are paying for it. (Wait -- maybe not so top secret. But it's more fun if we say it is!) Will they charge for content? Would you care if they did?

Scorecard

Folks seemed to like last week's TR-Lite -- perhaps we should take Queenie to the beach and take it easy more often?

The TR Lite: Calorie-Free, Just in Time for Swimsuit Season!

Ready for the weekend? We certainly are! In honor of that, here’s a quickie TR to get your afternoon started right -- so you can zoom out and dodge the crowds. The Queen’s already skated off to the beach, natch. Remember the sunscreen, children!

Forecast

Healthcare’s stayed in the news all week, and it’s here for the long haul: O’s reform legislation will be officially introduced in Congress. Will even half of what he’s proposed make it through?

GM might be heading for bankruptcy sooner than we thought, and right when Chrysler will lose ITS bankruptcy protection. Eep. Keep an eye on this AND oil prices, folks.

Fresh from the torturous media frenzy, Nancy P. is off to China next week to speak on energy and the environment. This after a no-comment press conference and a show of solidarity from the staff. Pelosi might have to leave the PLANET to get away from those pesky torture questions...

The CA Supreme Court will rule on Prop 8 this Tuesday (we know -- but sometimes Perez DOES report real news), and the DC gay marriage bill is under fire.

They’re interviewing for SCOTUS -- but don’t expect an announcement until AT LEAST next week.

Whatcha doing next Saturday? If the answer is, “my seventh grade teacher,” we found yer friends.

The Week That Was

Bo and Dick’s dueling security speeches had most of Twitter and the media rapt with attention for a while – Gawker has a lovely round-up of the turmoil. Even better: the Daily Show take.

Speaking of, please let us know... what the hell is Cheney trying to accomplish these days? Is it,

A: Underscore what the right perceives as O-hypocrisy on torture?
B: Protect his legacy?
C: Actually try to, as they say in the biz, "keep it real?"

We can't figure it out. If anyone out there has poll numbers on how well Cheney is playing the base, puh-LEEZE send 'em our way.

(PS: Dear Bushie, don’t worry, most of America feels liberated from you, too. Tell Cheney to go take a vacation, would you?)

The first bill to create a national limit on greenhouse-gas emissions was approved by a House committee yesterday -- is it time for serious eco-friendly policy making? Harry Reid says: "Word."

Steele, Steele, Steele. We know your party is, um, “restructuring,” but we can’t imagine this is helping.

Neither is this.

Oo, another CNBC meltdown! (This one is just for the LOLz.)

American Idol was an upset! Uh, apparently. Whatever -- we didn't watch, either. How much longer will this be on, anyway?

Quote of the Week

"The blogosphere is no alternative, crammed as it is with ravings and manipulations of every nut with a keyboard... Good journalism is structured and structure means responsibility... I would trust citizen journalism as much as I would trust citizen surgery." -Morley Safer, CBS News

Scorecard

Here's the Sunday morning show sched, but hopefully you'll be napping through all of it. Have some fun, and we'll see you next week!

Pelosi Tortured, Goracle to Self-Immolate, Google Fails

Queenie's in a tiff, no doubt about it. Didn't you read it here first that O wouldn't move on a torture witchhunt, bc he knew what Congressional Dems knew and when they knew it? Politics as usual, bay-bee. The Republican obit is veddy veddy premature, despite crowing from all the Dem pollsters.

Forecast

Watch the downward spiral and weep, dear readers. The conversation has ineptly (or deftly?) been changed to what Pelosi knew and when. Her rambling, document reading performance didn't help much. Dontcha know how these things work, chickens? Everyone on the Intelligence Committees AND the leadership of both parties has been in on the show -- and THAT's why wise O didn't want a partisan truth-telling commission. What is it about communications crisis preparedness that these politicos don't quite get? Eat crow young and tender while exuding confidence and announcing next steps. Then you own the next news cycle. Uh, right? Or stumble around blindly and deny, deny, deny. And hand it all to Rush on a silver platter.

Of course, the Senate Gitmo debate next week will keep this story burning (especially since Obama just confirmed he'll be resuming military trials). Republicans on the Senate Appropriations Committee timed the fight over the closure of the military prison at Guantánamo Bay, Cuba with a $91.3 billion supplemental war spending bill hitting the Senate floor. Hmmmm.... anyone paying attention up there on the Hill? Hellooo?

Save the planet -- or NOT? O says yes, and the House bill should be approved by August. But it faces tougher going in the Senate, where R's and blue D's are nervous about "cap and trade." So, voila -- a compromise climate change bill that House Dems hope will attract enough support to win approval next week by the Energy and Commerce Committee.

But all this wonky conversation could get REALLY REALLY fun -- the Goracle has "not ruled out" engaging in super cereal civil disobedience against new coal plants. Oooh -- can we watch? YouTube? That Gore TV station no one knows the name of? (For the latest on climate science or wonkery, sign up for Duke University's Nicholas Institute's new e-zine blog thingie. C'mon -- you know you want it.)

Debt Shangri-La, dah-links. Senate credit card bill (teehee) next week. We're so pleased that our beloved politicos hope to fix it all up so that we can continue to live on our exorbitant debt. Let's hope China keeps buying our U.S. Treasury notes so we can keep buying all that junky stuff they make. BUT -- unlike Wall Street -- we're still on the hook to (eventually) pay it all off. Hmmmm... what will our darling favorite economists say about our continuing debt addiction? Anyone keeping notes on who did what when so we can be sure to trot it all out in the next Presidential? Dancing in the shadow of the economic guillotine, mes enfants.

Let's watch as the Senate ponders the fate of the next FCC Chair. Hearings on Julius Genachowski's ends a political stalemate that has pitted Democrats seeking to fill the commission's seats sooner rather than later against Republicans, who had stalled the nomination. In the headlines or a snoozer? We say check it out on C-Span, late night edition. Wine glass in hand.

Okay, we'll try the hockey thing AGAIN. I sooooo hope our "source" has got this right, as Queenie cannot even be bothered to check TV listings about (gasp) sports. The Caps got knocked out of the Stanley Cup playoffs by Pittsburgh, but there is still potential with the NBA: The Houston Rockets pulled out a win, which means they will go to a final Game 7 against LA on Sunday 5/17. Expect to see many pretty faces in the LA crowd.

The Week That Was

O got decisive House approval for money to escalate U.S. military involvement in Afghanistan and Pakistan, but the victory obscured anxiety within his party about the course he is taking in the war-torn region. Oh -- and the top commander got canned, even as Pakistan ran a multi-million dollar ad campaign trying to persuade policymakers that they are also victims. Some Democrats -- as opponents of President Bush's war in Iraq -- see the same perils in the new administration's military moves. Plus ça change, my loves... (But at least we're focused in the RIGHT part of the world, this time.)

Release the photos or don't release the photos? (O). Release the memos or don't release the memos? (Cheney-CIA). They're gonna all pop up on the Internet somehow, someway, so why not get ahead of the curve, no? The good news is that we can't even get through a White House briefing on any of this without being interrupted by the reporters' ringing cell phones. Journalism ADHD on hyperdrive. Remember: if you can't say it in 140 characters, it doesn't exist!

Health care all around. Things got moving this week, as ubiquitous O and team touted various solutions and health care companies, and insurers announced cost-cutting measures. Let's set up some scorecards and keep track. The whole conversation is sure to be more complex than that NCAA brackets thingie.

We're loving the SCOTUS leaks, and the Ginsberg plea for a woman on the court. Women? Hispanics? Both? Preferably wearing tattoos that say ROE RAWKS?

SPEAKING of Roe RAWKS tattoos, Slate was all set to offer up Double X, a blog founded by women but meant for everyone. Okay, sure. But so far it's received mixed reviews. As our good friends in the blogosphere will tell us, controversy keeps 'em coming back! (And check out this piece by Ann Friedman about "women's interest" media and the national conversation. A worthy read!)

OMFG -- how did we LIVE without the outsourced brain that is Google? The search engine when down for nearly an hour yesterday, and the world as we knew it ended. Momentarily. In the meantime, Twitter exploded with a bitchfest of epic proportions -- and this just after that itty bitty #fixreply snafu.

We were very surprised that the new Miss America only got a GUEST hosting slot on Fox. Why not an entire show? Certainly her fifteen minutes could be stretched into an entire high ratings hate-filled season. Or did the Donald want too big a cut? And so nice Governor Palin jumped into the fray. Beauty queens are VERY threatened by gay marriage, apparently. Too sad, as gay men are their biggest fans.

Warning: personal screed notice. WHAT IS IT WITH ALL THE MOTORCADES? Is this evidence of a really active executive branch? Or just a very imperial one? Queenie can barely get any work done what with the shrieking of sirens. Our interns are in danger of being crushed under the carriage wheels whenever they venture out to Starbuck's (yes, former doomed aristocrat Queenie fondly remembers her own carriage days careening over peasants). Can the Bushies really have ventured out so rarely?

Scorecard

Funny we didn't realize that CBS's Schieffer had last Sunday morning show's coup with Cheney's "torture works" op-ad. That was the week's conversation shaper, fer sure. (Yeah, yeah -- head of Paki/Aghani on THAT OTHER show even as we approve millions and re-structure that little war... but who's paying attention?) Expect lots more drama ginned up by right-wing radio and unfortunate Repug demands for a witch hunt.

So... broadcast is not completely irrelevant yet, dear blogger friends. Steele will be facing off against Tim Kaine this Sunday. Watch for the entertainment quotient.

See ya next week!