Friday, January 20, 2012

1-20-12: Black Wednesday

President Obama approved his first 2012 campaign advertisement this week. The ad has plenty of critics, while others think the researchers should have done a better job at fact checking. It won't win over the Tea Party crowd, but for the independents, maybe a little Al Green will woo them over.

We can only hope...

The Week That Was

So it turns out that Rick Santorum won Iowa - not that it matters. A final count by the Iowa Republican Party shows Santorum beating creative tax swindler Mitt Romney by 34 votes. You win one, you lose one, Mittens. That's how these things work out. Also, just days before South Carolina, John McCain's 2008 opposition research encyclopedia just happened to drop for all to see. What could Romney's tax returns say that could possibly alienate him from his fellow 1% contributors? In other news, some guy named Jon Huntsman dropped out and enthusiastically endorsed his fellow RINO. No one cared about poor Jon, because good old Rick Perry - once seen as the savior of the GOP - called it quits. It seems America isn't ready for another bumbling Texan. As the Newtmentum builds, so do the sordid tales from Newt Gingrich's second wife, who claims, among other things, that the former Speaker wanted an open marriage. Republican Family Values.

Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker, in all of his infinite wisdom, turned down $37 million of socialist federal funding that would have gone towards setting up the state's healthcare exchange. ObamaCare: bad! Restricting healthcare options: good! Hopefully, the Governor will come around, or maybe he'll even add his name to the more than one million Wisconsinites who want to boot him from Madison.

Occupy Wall Street is running a little low on cash these days. The cold weather may have something to do with that. More than half of their $700,000 fund has already been spent to cover costs in New York and cities across the country. Did you know that OWS has a $100,000 bail out fund? That won't be nearly enough to cover the next mega-bank implosion. A few hundred protestors marched on Congress - far short of the 10,000 people that organizers had hoped for. We're reminiscing now of the bygone era of the 2010 Tea Party lawn-chair festivals

That Barack Obama is at it again, this time standing up for the environment (or maybe it's because November is just around the corner?). The State Department rejected the Keystone XL pipeline extension that would have delivered crude oil from the Canadian oil sands to refineries in Texas. The decision was rushed, says the Administration. To Husker fans: your team may have cratered this season, but at least you know that your Congressman is stickin' up for his true constituents - big oil. There's money to be made!

Are you keeping up with all the details with the Costa Concordia? It's getting a little too reality teevee-ish for us. The cruise ship's captain is in a whole lot of trouble for abandoning ship before helping his passengers. Apparently, he conveniently tripped and landed in a lifeboat. That seems reasonable enough, right? Unfortunately, there exists audio of a pissed off Coast Guard officer ordering Francesco Schettino to get his behind back on board. And then there's the mystery lady he sat down for dinner with. Who orders dinner while your ship is sinking?

Are You Not Entertained?

Do not forget about next Tuesday's State of the Union address. Rumor is we won't be seeing a repeat of last year's silly bipartisan buddy stunt. Poor Joe Lieberman.

Betty White turned 90 years young this week and she received a personal birthday message from our Barry. He couldn't resist going Orly Taitz on Betty and demanded she produce a long form birth certificate. Those birthers can be so demanding!

TR pauladeendiabetesHey, y'all! Paula Deen is taking some heat in the kitchen after coming clean about her type-2 diabetes diagnosis. What's really angering the internet people is that her announcement coincides with her endorsement of a pharmaceutical company's product. Some of her critics have been downright nasty.

Jerry Springer and Gretchen Carlson. Now that's entertainment. Thank you again, Fox "News."

Oh, we're not letting CNN off the hook for this one: Magic wall expert John King became Newt Gingrich's latest target for opening up last night's debate with question about his ex. David Gergen says the exchange was one of the most explosive in debate history. Coming from Mr. Gergen, that's saying something.

Interweb Tomfoolery

High school scholars everywhere became aimless Wednesday as Wikipedia and other popular websites went offline in protest of the Stop Online Piracy Act (SOPA). Thankfully, the House Judiciary Committee has delayed consideration of the bill. SOPA's sister bill in the Senate, the PROTECT IP Act (PIPA), has also been set aside. Many esteemed members of Congress shifted their positions. We wonder why.

A new study by the University of Minnesota's Carlson School of Management indicates that men who perceive a scarcity of women in a population end up saving less and borrowing more. Researchers say it all boils down to competition. What do you think about this conclusion, loyal readers?

Seattle received plenty of snow this week and as imagined residents had plenty of fun on the streets. Well, except one lady. She ruined the shot! At least crows in Russia have no such qualms.

Normally, parents consider "Take Your Child to Work Day" as one of the happier moments in their often stress-filled daily schedule. So that's why one Illinois mother and her boyfriend went a step further and robbed a bank. Hey, they needed a lookout.

Fridays with Abigail

For those who don't know me, I might as well confess up front that I'm a data nerd.  So for me, Facebook Insights is a goldmine, especially the newer "People Talking About This" feature. "Likes" are an important measurement for your brand or campaign, but the real test of whether a community is going to come out for you is in their level of engagement.  Engagement as tracked by this feature means anyone who has had a relationship with your page in the past 7 days, either by sharing one of your posts, commenting, liking, responding to a poll, RSVPing for an event, or recommending your page to others.  On your Insights page, you can also see what the increase or decrease in engagement has been compared to previous weeks.  Facebook can be a lot of fun for sharing photos of your events, but if you are using it strategically, you'll be able to determine factually whether you're really exciting your community in a sustainable way.

Out on the Town

One of these days we'll get some measurable amount of snow. Until then, enjoy your weekend:

  • K-Holes, The Gumbas, DJ Kid Congo Powers & DJ Baby Alcatraz, M.C. Majestic Ape tonight at Comet Ping Pong 
Scorecard

Two down in a week! That has to be a record and gives us a much needed break from this monotonous primary season. South Carolinians head to the ballot box tomorrow. Newt has been trending upwards since last week, but that was before his ex broke all of his little toys and his dream of occupying the White House. Bah ha ha!

Until next week, y'all,

RoyalExecutioner


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