Friday, April 23, 2010

The TR: Heckling the Prez, Marginalizing the Ladies and Jumpin' Ship with Charlie

Did you celebrate Earth Day like a good puppy? (Or like the adorable First Family? Save the tigers!) We shut off a few lights, hopped on the Metro to TR Central, even used some reusable bags... maybe rapped about it a little. Wait! We do that EVERY day! But we DEFINITELY had a better Earth Day than this former Fox anchor.

Environment aside, there are LOTS of things to snark about this week. Get busy!

Forecast

Yuck! That volcano is still spewing out ash clouds. It's going to take quite a bit of time for everything to get back to normal; even Obama had to cancel on the funeral for the Polish president. Good thing the Brits have things in order! Airlines are feeling the pinch, but the RNC is doing its part to help out -- and NOTHING can stand in the way of love. This rollercoaster might not be over yet, though -- scientists (and the rest of Europe) are worried about a greater threat from a neighboring volcano.

Obama went to Wall Street to pressure banks to not fight his reforms. Dems are looking for ways to push financial reform legislation ahead of November, while the "party of no," well, you know. Also, Sheila Bair and a fellow regulator had some choice wordsf or each other.

Looks like (as usual) healthcare will NEVER get out of our Google Readers -- even though coverage has dropped, we are still looking for news about it and for conversation about regulation (speak of the devil) and the role of government in general. Most recently, reports of higher costs and speculation about what the fall will mean for Dems is topping the list.

The battle for the next Supreme Court justice is heating up in Washington. Obama invited leading senators to the White House for advice for a replacement for Justice Stevens. The president has already begun interviewing candidates. Time for some new Supreme dramz!

(Former) maverick John McCain is heading far-right and a bit more unhinged when it comes immigration reform. Arizona has pending legislation requiring police to stop anyone suspected of being an illegal immigrant (oh, and, by the way, a "birther bill" making its way through). Does this mean that immigration reform will FINALLY become a political priority? 'Cause HELLOOOO!

Sad news for D.C. residents: Voting rights won't be coming your way for at least another congressional session. Let's get a move on, people!

The Week That Was

Whenever there's news about the financial services industry, it's safe to say it's usually not good for the folks on Main Street. Goldman Sachs has a LOT to answer for. The firm is paying staff more than $5 billion in bonuses and compensation while charges of fraud threaten to cripple an already damaged brand. By the way, that's an average of $170,000 for each of Goldman's 32,500 employees! Jon Stewart broke this one down for us and the rest of the millennials.

Teabaggers last week, pro-gun activists this week. Funny, isn't it, that it was Obama who signed legislation to permit people to pack heat in our national parks. Thank you, short-term memory!

Obama flew out to California earlier this week to give Barbara Boxer/the DNC a big boost. It got heated when some hecklers called on the prez to repeal DADT ASAP. (They were like, "Do it!," and he was all, "I AM, OK?," and they're like, "No, seriously!," and then he was like, "I AM SERIOUS OMG.") Gay rights activists are also in a huff about this disgraceful story of a mistreated couple in northern California.

Bill Clinton continued making the media rounds and was interviewed by Dubya's daughter, Jenna. Michele Bachmann thinks the former president is trying to "take [her] out." Nice fundraising appeal, Michele!

The Democratic Senatorial Campaign Committee is having fun with recent comments from Nevada GOP candidate Sue Lowden, who recently solved our healthcare woes -- it's all about the chickens. Obviously.

Farewell, Charlie. Once the undeniable front-runner, the Florida governor is trailing badly in the Republican primary, and has been considering an independent bid. He won't be able to count on his Republican "friends" to back him if he jumps ship. Maybe an FBI investigation of Rubio will help him out?

The Feds introduced a new $100 bill in yet another attempt to stop counterfeiting. (Has that ever worked?) Repubs like Matt Drudge IMMEDIATELY started hollering, forgetting the fact that this redesign was first conceptualized under a, uh, previous president.

In makes-Queenie-want-to-punch-something news, the editor of the Law Vegas Journal-Review is in some hot water after penning an article calling for repeal of women's rights to vote. Also infuriating? Here's how the Nationals expect their fans to behave. Now check out the entire stub. Even more rage-inducing? The Ohio Republican Executive Committee sent out a mailer telling voters to put Betty Sutton "out of the House and back in the kitchen." Don't worry about that loud noise you just heard -- it was just Queenie's brain exploding.

Are You Not Entertained?

Kal Penn recently left the white castle. Early Tuesday morning, the Harold and Kumar star was reportedly robbed at gunpoint in this city. Thankfully he wasn't hurt. Best of luck on his return to his distinguished career!

Kate was FINALLY booted from DWTS -- even a desperate e-mail to "friends" couldn't save the day (and extend viewer agony). You know, Kate, there are some babies that sort of look like you that would probably like to hang out... just sayin'.

Oh, crap. LOST spoilers. Click if you dare.

Joe Biden made an appearance on The View this week. Watch what he had to say about Sarah and his big f$%#in' healthcare remark.

Cartoons have been all up in this news cycle lately. First, the creators of South Park faced death threats this week over a depiction of Muhammad as a talking bear -- and, predictably, they are less than pleased with Comedy Central's censorship. Second, remember Archie? There's a new character in town, and he's a-ok with us!

Have you heard the news about Lance Baxter? We had no idea who he was until we found out the voice behind Geico's gecko was fired over a voicemail aimed at Teabaggers. Two thumbs down!

Interweb Tomfoolery
How'd you like to be the guy that lost the latest iPhone prototype? In a bar? Where it got ripped apart bya top tech blog? On your birthday? If that guy isn't in Germany right now, we don't know what's wrong with him.

Americans lit up for 4/20 and apparently it was a good time.

We've been taking this iPad thing with a grain of snark, until we heard this story about a 99-year-old woman with glaucoma rediscovering her love of reading and writing thanks to this newfangled contraption. How, we ask you, HOW can we joke about that?! Thanks a lot, Apple. Jerks.

It's a Repub new media CHALLENGE. Them's fightin' words, y'all!

New Facebook features are sparking new concerns over internet privacy, and Google geeks are leaving the service in droves. Will you be one of them?

We didn't see the use of Google Search Stories until we asked ourselves this very important question: what do Bert and the Cookie Monster search for on the Google?

The justices of our highest court haven't been listening to the know-how of you informed social media gurus. Um... at all. You guys! Call us!

This woman was banned from every pub in England and Wales. How's that for a record? Thankfully, it'll never happened in America. On that note, this video of a wasted flip-flopper has gone viral.

And listen to what the YouTube'd teabaggers are saying about the direction of the country. Did you know that Obama is banning ALL fishing in America? Yeah, we didn't know, either.

Out on the Town

Go out and enjoy Earth Week, 'cause the eco-fun ain't stopping anytime soon! If you're feeling like a do-gooder, go clean up around the National Zoo or hang out at the Servathon. If you're extra cool, you might find Queenie dancing at the Climate Rally on Sunday. It's also fee-free week -- here's a list of parks that are free through Sunday so you can get your nature on.

Tea Partiers need not apply: The Kenyan embassy is hosting a REAL tea party on the Hill next Tuesday (with tea leaf readings!). And, if you're feeling extra cultured, you can go pretend you're Parisian in Georgetown. Bit of a stretch, but hey, it's a recession!

Your required Top Chef update: Tom Colicchio was at Ben's, and we have proof. One of Queenie's top secret informants, however, pointed out that the use of forks made Tom a certified wuss. Luckily, Tom had an explanation.

Scorecard

Bill made his rounds, Teabaggers stayed in the news, women's rights are still under fire and that pesky volcano stayed relevant (and pesky!). Not too shabby.

Until next week!

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