Friday, April 30, 2010

The TR: Arizona's Implosion, Carl Levin's [expletive] Deals and Crist's Way Out

Buenas tardes, queridos amigos! Shoot, sorry -- don't tell Tim James that Queenie sometimes USES the Spanish she learned in college. She's an English major! Really! She has her documentation to prove it!

Snark-about-the-third-place-candidate aside, it's been a wild week. Let's get to it.


Obama toured the heartland this week, starting with Iowa. Almost brings us back to 2007, don't it? His message to the people: Wall Street and Washington don't understand Main Street, and it's all the Republicans' fault for blocking reform. Teabaggers were looking to cause a ruckus ahead of his visits, natch. Is this tour a preview of what's coming up for 2010 and 2012?

Arizona governor Jan Brewer signed into a law what is likely the toughest immigration legislation in the country. Thousands protested the governor's action at the state capitol, and Obama gave supporters of the measure a sharp rebuke. Tourists are taking a hike, and cities across the country are looking to put their money elsewhere. But, while everyone is duking it out over the new law, you might not have noticed that, on the following day, the governor made Arizona the first of many states to limit abortion coverage in state health exchanges. Some of her fellow GOP'ers are going further with even nuttier proposals. Will we see comprehensive immigration reform? The answer is... maybe?

We haven't heard from them for a while: the birthers are coming to town next month! Grab some popcorn, sit back, and enjoy the spectacle, since marchin' season ain't quite over yet. Oh, and Hawaii's legislature just passed that bill limiting requests for Obama's birth certificate. In your face!

The star sightings may have already begun in light of the WHCA dinner on Saturday -- the most eco-friendly one yet! The list of guests include the Jonas Brothers, Alec Baldwin, Jon Bon Jovi, Ryan Seacrest and Betty White, among others. This whole Jay Leno hosting thing, though? Lame. Should have called Conan.

The Week That Was

Goldman Sachs execs were on the Hill this week to face a grilling before the Senate. Carl Levin didn't hold back. Nebraska senator Ben Nelson owned up to his nickname, joining the GOP to prevent debate from beginning on the Senate floor on financial regulatory reform. No corn for you! Things got moving again after three rounds of voting. Also, it appears Senator Jim Bunning can't wait for retirement!

11 offshore workers were likely lost in an explosion on their rig. Oil has now reached the Florida and Louisiana coastlines, and despite Obama's reassurances we are definitely having second thoughts on "drill, baby, drill." Make BP foot the bill! And, uh oh, looks like there are second thoughts on that climate change bill passing anytime soon, too. By the by, Obama's Interior Department approved a plan to build the nation's first offshore wind farm, a decision was nearly a decade in the making. Turns out it was even opposed by the late Senator Ted Kennedy. Things could quickly get ugly.

Oh, Crist! Charlie left the Grand Old Party Thursday and will run as an independent. He's way down on the ballot now, folks. His former party told him to give back the cash and never come back. Ouch.

Greece is in pretty bad shape, and it just got worse this week. With Spain's jobless rate hitting 20% and Germany still hesitant to move towards a bailout, could it be too late to save a dour situation?

Queenie WILL admit that there is one sport she watches enthusiastically, but Wednesday wasn't a great night for it. We truly hope you Caps fans are feeling better. Here, we'll buy you one of these to cheer you up, okay?

Are You Not Entertained?

Letterman says what everyone else is thinking: we all love Leno, but he's a boob. And he knows it, too.

Speaker Pelosi "appears" on the cover of Capitol File, and woooowww... did she get Mariah Carey's airbrushing gurus or what?

South Park's creators took a ton of heat for an episode "depicting" the Prophet Muhammad (by which we mean, putting him in a bear suit). Luckily, they found some support from Bart Simpson.

Over the weekend, Majority Leader Steny Hoyer and Majority Whip James Clyburn got down with their bad selves at a fundraiser. We really had no reason to post this other than to marvel at their superior coordination. No wonder they're in Congress, right?

Interweb Tomfoolery

This article on PowerPoint's lack of effectiveness for the U.S. military has been floating around the web all week, pushed mainly by research associates who get stuck designing Powerpoint presentations all day. Stand together, my friends! Never again will you be forced to "make my bullet points go all swirl-y" or answer the question, "OMG, why isn't my video clip working?!"

Hugo Chavez is on Twitter, and with only two tweets it is already a "success." Think he'll start retweeting Ashton?

If you were a little confused at Facebook's Community Pages roll out, so were we. We dug a little to get the real scoop and aren't liking what we see so far.

We support the troops! Especially when they're THIS synchronized, and especially when they bring their own props.

The bankers are out in force in Washington, but they're also on the street, preying (umm, literally) on poor consumers.

Gordon Brown is caught being super serious in a heated exchange with a constituent over immigration.

There's much more to finding Waldo then we first thought.

Depending on her taste in cars, this woman may just have gotten an incredible deal.

Out on the Town

The Kentucky Derby is happening on Saturday and parties will be in full swing. We particularly recommend the Bonnets and Bowties party at Round Robin or (for the free admission-loving among us) Derby Day at the Rams Head Tavern.

Enjoy this beautiful weather tonight with an outdoor screening of Clueless at the I Love the '90s film festival kicking off in Rosslyn. Queenie will be dancing it up at the Citizen Cope show tonight, and heading over to Passport DC on Saturday to get her cultural fix.

Celebrate Cinco de Mayo a smidge early at the Mall on Sunday with a dance festival, childrens' workshops and free food. If you're feeling extra-hipster on Sunday, throw on your best sundress (you too, fellas) and hit up Wonderland for dancing and a pig roast.

Finally, say what you want about D.C., but never say we don't care about what's really important.

Shameless Self-Promotion

Feminism2.0, a project of Queenie's and her Character Assassin Gloria Pan, was featured in Newsweek this week as a part of a roundtable discussion on abortion. Check out the article and leave your thoughts.

Also a BFD, our client Cohen Milstein struck a blow for gender justice this week when the U.S. Court of Appeals, Ninth Circuit, ruled that women who claimed to be unfairly paid by Wal-Mart could sue as a class. It's being billed as one of the largest class action suits in U.S. history. Our team garned coverage in all the major media outlets, including the coveted talking head spots. Watch National Journal's "Lawyer of the Decade" Joe Sellers go on Cavuto Monday at 6 p.m. ET.


Don't expect immigration reform to lose its place in the news cycle anytime soon, kids. Same with financial reform. But please, please, PLEASE don't stop paying attention to reproductive rights -- the last thing we need is for a little thing like, oh, freedom of choice to slip under the radar.

See you next Friday!

Friday, April 23, 2010

The TR: Heckling the Prez, Marginalizing the Ladies and Jumpin' Ship with Charlie

Did you celebrate Earth Day like a good puppy? (Or like the adorable First Family? Save the tigers!) We shut off a few lights, hopped on the Metro to TR Central, even used some reusable bags... maybe rapped about it a little. Wait! We do that EVERY day! But we DEFINITELY had a better Earth Day than this former Fox anchor.

Environment aside, there are LOTS of things to snark about this week. Get busy!


Yuck! That volcano is still spewing out ash clouds. It's going to take quite a bit of time for everything to get back to normal; even Obama had to cancel on the funeral for the Polish president. Good thing the Brits have things in order! Airlines are feeling the pinch, but the RNC is doing its part to help out -- and NOTHING can stand in the way of love. This rollercoaster might not be over yet, though -- scientists (and the rest of Europe) are worried about a greater threat from a neighboring volcano.

Obama went to Wall Street to pressure banks to not fight his reforms. Dems are looking for ways to push financial reform legislation ahead of November, while the "party of no," well, you know. Also, Sheila Bair and a fellow regulator had some choice wordsf or each other.

Looks like (as usual) healthcare will NEVER get out of our Google Readers -- even though coverage has dropped, we are still looking for news about it and for conversation about regulation (speak of the devil) and the role of government in general. Most recently, reports of higher costs and speculation about what the fall will mean for Dems is topping the list.

The battle for the next Supreme Court justice is heating up in Washington. Obama invited leading senators to the White House for advice for a replacement for Justice Stevens. The president has already begun interviewing candidates. Time for some new Supreme dramz!

(Former) maverick John McCain is heading far-right and a bit more unhinged when it comes immigration reform. Arizona has pending legislation requiring police to stop anyone suspected of being an illegal immigrant (oh, and, by the way, a "birther bill" making its way through). Does this mean that immigration reform will FINALLY become a political priority? 'Cause HELLOOOO!

Sad news for D.C. residents: Voting rights won't be coming your way for at least another congressional session. Let's get a move on, people!

The Week That Was

Whenever there's news about the financial services industry, it's safe to say it's usually not good for the folks on Main Street. Goldman Sachs has a LOT to answer for. The firm is paying staff more than $5 billion in bonuses and compensation while charges of fraud threaten to cripple an already damaged brand. By the way, that's an average of $170,000 for each of Goldman's 32,500 employees! Jon Stewart broke this one down for us and the rest of the millennials.

Teabaggers last week, pro-gun activists this week. Funny, isn't it, that it was Obama who signed legislation to permit people to pack heat in our national parks. Thank you, short-term memory!

Obama flew out to California earlier this week to give Barbara Boxer/the DNC a big boost. It got heated when some hecklers called on the prez to repeal DADT ASAP. (They were like, "Do it!," and he was all, "I AM, OK?," and they're like, "No, seriously!," and then he was like, "I AM SERIOUS OMG.") Gay rights activists are also in a huff about this disgraceful story of a mistreated couple in northern California.

Bill Clinton continued making the media rounds and was interviewed by Dubya's daughter, Jenna. Michele Bachmann thinks the former president is trying to "take [her] out." Nice fundraising appeal, Michele!

The Democratic Senatorial Campaign Committee is having fun with recent comments from Nevada GOP candidate Sue Lowden, who recently solved our healthcare woes -- it's all about the chickens. Obviously.

Farewell, Charlie. Once the undeniable front-runner, the Florida governor is trailing badly in the Republican primary, and has been considering an independent bid. He won't be able to count on his Republican "friends" to back him if he jumps ship. Maybe an FBI investigation of Rubio will help him out?

The Feds introduced a new $100 bill in yet another attempt to stop counterfeiting. (Has that ever worked?) Repubs like Matt Drudge IMMEDIATELY started hollering, forgetting the fact that this redesign was first conceptualized under a, uh, previous president.

In makes-Queenie-want-to-punch-something news, the editor of the Law Vegas Journal-Review is in some hot water after penning an article calling for repeal of women's rights to vote. Also infuriating? Here's how the Nationals expect their fans to behave. Now check out the entire stub. Even more rage-inducing? The Ohio Republican Executive Committee sent out a mailer telling voters to put Betty Sutton "out of the House and back in the kitchen." Don't worry about that loud noise you just heard -- it was just Queenie's brain exploding.

Are You Not Entertained?

Kal Penn recently left the white castle. Early Tuesday morning, the Harold and Kumar star was reportedly robbed at gunpoint in this city. Thankfully he wasn't hurt. Best of luck on his return to his distinguished career!

Kate was FINALLY booted from DWTS -- even a desperate e-mail to "friends" couldn't save the day (and extend viewer agony). You know, Kate, there are some babies that sort of look like you that would probably like to hang out... just sayin'.

Oh, crap. LOST spoilers. Click if you dare.

Joe Biden made an appearance on The View this week. Watch what he had to say about Sarah and his big f$%#in' healthcare remark.

Cartoons have been all up in this news cycle lately. First, the creators of South Park faced death threats this week over a depiction of Muhammad as a talking bear -- and, predictably, they are less than pleased with Comedy Central's censorship. Second, remember Archie? There's a new character in town, and he's a-ok with us!

Have you heard the news about Lance Baxter? We had no idea who he was until we found out the voice behind Geico's gecko was fired over a voicemail aimed at Teabaggers. Two thumbs down!

Interweb Tomfoolery
How'd you like to be the guy that lost the latest iPhone prototype? In a bar? Where it got ripped apart bya top tech blog? On your birthday? If that guy isn't in Germany right now, we don't know what's wrong with him.

Americans lit up for 4/20 and apparently it was a good time.

We've been taking this iPad thing with a grain of snark, until we heard this story about a 99-year-old woman with glaucoma rediscovering her love of reading and writing thanks to this newfangled contraption. How, we ask you, HOW can we joke about that?! Thanks a lot, Apple. Jerks.

It's a Repub new media CHALLENGE. Them's fightin' words, y'all!

New Facebook features are sparking new concerns over internet privacy, and Google geeks are leaving the service in droves. Will you be one of them?

We didn't see the use of Google Search Stories until we asked ourselves this very important question: what do Bert and the Cookie Monster search for on the Google?

The justices of our highest court haven't been listening to the know-how of you informed social media gurus. Um... at all. You guys! Call us!

This woman was banned from every pub in England and Wales. How's that for a record? Thankfully, it'll never happened in America. On that note, this video of a wasted flip-flopper has gone viral.

And listen to what the YouTube'd teabaggers are saying about the direction of the country. Did you know that Obama is banning ALL fishing in America? Yeah, we didn't know, either.

Out on the Town

Go out and enjoy Earth Week, 'cause the eco-fun ain't stopping anytime soon! If you're feeling like a do-gooder, go clean up around the National Zoo or hang out at the Servathon. If you're extra cool, you might find Queenie dancing at the Climate Rally on Sunday. It's also fee-free week -- here's a list of parks that are free through Sunday so you can get your nature on.

Tea Partiers need not apply: The Kenyan embassy is hosting a REAL tea party on the Hill next Tuesday (with tea leaf readings!). And, if you're feeling extra cultured, you can go pretend you're Parisian in Georgetown. Bit of a stretch, but hey, it's a recession!

Your required Top Chef update: Tom Colicchio was at Ben's, and we have proof. One of Queenie's top secret informants, however, pointed out that the use of forks made Tom a certified wuss. Luckily, Tom had an explanation.


Bill made his rounds, Teabaggers stayed in the news, women's rights are still under fire and that pesky volcano stayed relevant (and pesky!). Not too shabby.

Until next week!

Friday, April 16, 2010

The TR: Tea Party Crashin', Conan's Grand Return and an End to Tickle Fights

After the traffic-havoc of the Nuclear Summit, we enjoyed the company of some Tea Partiers (and crashers!) this week. 'Tis the season, what with Tax Day and the sunny skies outside. Juuust lovely.

What else went down in DC and beyond this week? Queenie and her loyal team has you covered!


All this legislative debate-talk is making us dizzy! This week President Obama met with congressional leaders in an effort to come to some compromise over financial regulatory reform. Chris Dodd isn't having it, and may have decided cut Republicans out of negotiations.

Sunday, be sure to catch Bubba on This Week with Jake Tapper. They will cover Haiti's recovery effort, politics, and the work of the Clinton Global Foundation. Looks like a bit of a media tour, since he was just at CAP today speaking on the Oklahoma City bombing. He never can stay out of the spotlight for long, can he?

Speaking of Oklahoma, Tea Partiers there are cheering as possible legislation to create a state militia could be introduced. Too bad for them, because Obama would still get the last word (read Article II, Section 2). While we're still on the subject, it looks like Scotty threw Sarah and her Tea Partiers overboard (you know, so he keeps on that centrist path). Finally, New York Tea Party gubernatorial hopeful Carl Paladino apologized for some racy and racist e-mails. This comes after his announcement of a love child. Go, Teabaggers! Believe in the movement!

Nebraska became the first state in the Union to require women seeking abortion to be screened for mental and physical problems. Another bill that went into effect will ban abortions after the fetus reaches 20 weeks. The Tennessee House of Representatives passed a bill that would prevent insurers from offering abortions in that state's exchange. Also, Governor Pawlenty of Minnesota signed this proclamation for the month of April, ahead of his 2012 run for the presidency. Ladies, if you haven't been paying attention to your reproductive rights lately, now is the time.

The Massa saga is not over yet! We knew you wanted more, so here's the latest. A former staffer has also filed a complaint, which could lead to a lawsuit against the former Congressman. Will this story EVER end?

Tragedy struck Poland over the weekend. President Kaczynski, his wife, and many senior officials perished. Our thoughts and prayers to the Polish people. Obama will be flying to Poland this weekend to attend the funeral.

The Week That Was

Tax Day has come and gone, and looks like our president is making it rain. Makes sense, what with all the book sales, but he's got nothing on Queen Sarah. Speaking of Sarah, her diva-like demands while on her speaking tours were revealed by some intrepid CSU students this week, making bendy straws the new stiletto shoes of the political glamour world.

We've reminded ourselves over and over again that we shouldn't stir up the wrath of angry Teabaggers -- but this week was just too much for us! They descended upon Washington like gnats in midsummer to the delight of comedians. Did you join the fun? Did you catch the rapping? What are they protesting, anyways? Obama took a little time to poke at them too, saying, really, they should be thanking him, not yelling at him. But who can argue with a good sign or two?

The Nuclear Security Summit took over our lives and our parking spots earlier this week in Washington (our hearts go out to the surviving family of Constance Holden). Some good news did come out of it: several nations have agreed to rid themselves of weapons-grade nuclear materials, even though the real impact of this event and agreement will probably amount to nothing. However, Iran is still a tough issue that needs to be worked out, and Americans are (rightly) concerned about the nuclear issue in increasing numbers.

Michelle Obama made an unannounced visit to quake-ravaged Haiti before her three-day visit in Mexico. This was her first solo trip as First Lady without Barack to another country. She should totally do this more.

Anthony Weiner is competing with Rahm for classiest quote of the year. Do we have a winner?

Congressional staffers are little punks on the Hill, according to some current and former GOP representatives. Apparently some have forgotten they can't do their work without them. Hey, you think the recent unintended consequences of the healthcare bill had anything to do with it? (Probably not, but man, that'd be a good story!)

A volcano in Iceland threw a wrench into thousands of travelers' itineraries late this week (and caused unintended hilarity as journalists attempted to pronounce the volcano's name). Best of luck to those stranded getting to where they need to be -- and don't listen to this guy, Iceland. You've still got Bjork. In more serious natural disaster news: An earthquake killed hundreds in China.

Are You Not Entertained?

CoCo surprised us all and is moving from network TV to cable. The currently unnamed show begins in November. He's on his comedy tour right now, which we're sad to miss, but luckily YouTube has come to the rescue with some homemade clips. Still can't get enough? Asian Conan has you covered.

Obama hung out with Gloria Estefan yesterday to talk Cuba. She was criticized for throwing a Democratic fundraiser, but we are more shocked at the price tag for attending.

A new book claims that Eliot Spitzer was so "voracious" that he went for a, uh, triple play. And a new book about Oprah made claims of lesbian affairs, false stories of poverty and prostitution. It's a classy day for the publishing industry, isn't it?

Down at the Southern Republican Leadership Conference, Hannity met up with a rapper-fan of his. Afterward, we're guessing Sean took part in the debauchery with fellow Fox News'er Major Garrett.

Larry King is SINGLE! Hey ladieeeees...

Interweb Tomfoolery

What better way to celebrate the completion of your taxes than by performing aerial acrobatics. THIS is the way to make connecting flights!

The iPad is still a hot topic even this long after its release -- turns out you can even run a country with it! We are a little tired of all the media coverage, but then this iPad-loving cat came along and COMPLETELY made our week. And hey, we've found an ingenious workaround for iPad printing!

Remember the social-media-themed South Park we had you watch last week? It's coming to life, and you could be a part of it. Isn't new media fantastic?

KFC launched its calorie bomb on Monday, much to the Internet's chagrin. Read the not-so-friendly testimonials and check out other outrageous fast food items... and then go throw up a little. Blech.

What's a tactical nuclear penguin? We're here to tell you. Just don't rat us out to your boss if you come to work after having one too many.

Think you're politically savvy? You're probably convinced you are after reading the TR for all this time. Take this quiz and see how you fare against your fellow Americans -- Queenie got 80% of them correct (and she's a little embarrassed!).

Everybody's got to make money somehow, including Twitter (it's a recession, ain't it?). Ever wondered which celebrities had the stupidest Twitter followers? Check out the competition here. And, Tweeters rejoice! The Library of Congress will be archiving every public tweet since Twitter's launch. We know you've been contributing intelligently and succinctly to this archive that will be read for generations.

Out on the Town

Take the kiddies to an early Earth Day celebration with the Smithsonian this Saturday (and meet the mascot from Queenie's alma mater, who is, naturally, green). This might as well be Earth week, what with all the events happening to gear up to the Climate Rally next weekend.

In fun dance party news, the Blisspop Spring Extravaganza, in addition to having a fabulous name, is happening at the U Street Music Hall Saturday night. Queenie, however, will be getting her DJ on to BT over at Ibiza.

In search of delicious eats? Saturday marks Hank's Oyster Bar's festival of slurping-- for $75, hit up the all-you-can-eat oysters and plenty of beer to go with it. Also, Tenpenh starts their weekly pig roast this Sunday.

Finally, for the extra geeky among you (and WOW is this geeky) bring your iPhones to the Foursquare Day Swarm tonight at Public for some awesome prizes, a new badge or two and the chance to see just how many other nerds are as excited about this stuff as you are. Queenie would join you but she's, um, busy. Very, very busy.


On the ball re: the nuclear summit, Kyrgyzstan and Tea Partiers, but who could have predicted these crazy natural disasters? That's right, no one. Queenliness, unfortunately, is only SO close to Godliness.

Thanks for the love, and see you next week!

Friday, April 9, 2010

The TR: Nike's Marketing Genius, Palin's Media Blitz and Steve Jobs' Big Grin

What's up, ladies and gents? We hope you've enjoyed the fabulously great weather this week -- feels like summer, don't it? There has been so much going on in the news that we barely know where to begin! We started on a high note with the White House Easter Egg Roll and have been going non-stop ever since. Read on if you need to catch up!


Justice John Paul Stevens has officially announced his impending retirement from the SC, giving Barack a chance to make his nomination by October and giving Teabaggers a chance to get all riled up about it (weird, right? They're normally so calm.) We here at TR Central would LOVE to see a lady hold the title, but it's a little early for speculation. Not that that's stopping any bloggers.

(And guess who else is retiring? Queenie has been cheering all day!)

Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu canceled his scheduled trip to DC for the Nuclear Security Summit next week (which, by the way, DC'ers should be aware of for traffic-blocking reasons). The decision not to attend isn't all that surprising, but it's drawing media scrutiny on Israel's attitudes towards and possession of nukes -- the result they were probably hoping to avoid by pulling out. But since this is Obama's pet issue, and after he and Russia's Medvedev were in Prague to sign a new nuclear disarmament treaty that replaces START -- which calls for both countries to reduce their nuclear arsenals of deployed warheads by 30% over seven years -- this one will stay in the news for a while.

The relationship between the Obama Administration and President Karzai in Afghanistan has gotten dicey. He seems serious about joining the Taliban. Obama is trying to make amends (we guess a little etiquette never hurt anybody) but will that be enough?

After days of violence, Kyrgyzstan's president and government were ousted by opposition. President Kurmanbek Bakiev refused calls to resign. The unrest began after increases in electricity and fuel rates and arrests of opposition leaders. Was Russia behind it?

The worst mining disaster in the United States in more than a quarter-century occurred in West Virginia. There's more to the story than we thought; expect hearings in the House and Senate, and (for a while) chatter about energy sources and coal.

Next Thursday is Tax Day! Woohoo... or not. We hope you've finished your forms by now. The day will also be marked by Tea Party rallies across the country. No doubt they will be arriving by public transportation or driving on federal highways to enjoy the clean air protected by choking regulation!

Did you hit up your first Nats game of the season yet? Despite Obama's performance, we're optimistic after their win last night over the Phillies.

The Week That Was

Remember a certain team of mavericks that went down in defeat more than a year ago? Well, according to one member of that dream team (heeere's Johnny!) he wasn't so mavericky! Does he really play us for fools? What's this, then? Have you ever wondered what would have happened had the election turned out differently? Also, Sarah's spokesperson isn't endearing her new show toward us East Coast folk. Wait, were we East Coast folk actually going to watch this?

Turmoil over at the RNC after last week's bondage-gate continues with the resignation of the committee's chief of staff, Ken McKay. Wealthy donors are seething and jumping ship. How is Michael responding under fire? Not so classy, we hear. Don't worry, all is going well -- if you believe Sarah, that is (doesn't look that way over here on the East Coast, Caribou Barbie!). Finally, Jon Stewart did his best to get the Chairman on his show for an interview.

Speaking of Republicans, us Virginians (wooo, East Coast!) at the TR were ashamed at the recent actions of its elected officials. Governor McDonnell's latest proclamation reviving Confederate History Month has received some sharp rebukes, and he delivered a much-needed apology soon after. But the blow had already been dealt. Way to go, Bob.

This has not been a good week for air travelers. One airline is preparing to charge passengers for carry-on items, and another is considering charging coin for on-board lavatory use. To top it off, diplomatic immunity saved a Qatar official from some deep trouble.

California dreamin'... or spendin,' in this case. All that cash might be making a difference in Whitman vs. Brown. Speakin' of, Southern California received a big jolt earlier this week, and not financially.

In adorable yet sad news only somewhat related to airplanes, this owl is scared of heights and refuses to fly.

Are You Not Entertained?

We are impressed, Nike marketers! In the midst of Tiger's return to golf, you launched this viral video 101 for those who "represent celebrity philandering." This creepy video of Tiger Woods gazing into our eyes while his deceased father asks what he has learned is already a hit, and spoofs are already out of control. And guess whose logo is in every single one of those spoofs? Go ahead, take your time. You'll get it eventually.

MSNBC's David Shuster was caught by his current employer doing a gig over at CNN. His boss was livid, to say the least. It looks like he's already been given the boot.

Oprah announced her new show, debuting next year. Will you be watching?

Queenie is ecstatic to see Weird Al Yankovic put on his Grammar Police hat and lead the proper English revolution. Her nerdy self is even happier about this mixtape for English majors.

DC has been just BUZZING about the Top Chef filming happening now. Queenie, an unabashed fan herself, has been following the tipsters like crazy. Have any sightings? Drop us a line!

Interweb Tomfoolery

As you all know, Apple's iPad was available to the masses over the weekend. Did you catch a glimpse of the Steve? Here's how one group of teens celebrate the vaunted release. Shame on them! Users may consider mimicking that behavior, however, because the technical issues have already begun. This is what you get for buying the first edition, y'all. And word is the iPad may receive competition in the near future. Who knew that peeps got in line, too?

Oh, f#%&. Net neutrality fail.

We've always been told to read the fine print. In this case, way too many customers of a computer game store ignored that sage advice.

A fabulous idea: a fingergun (you know, this) button for email messages.

It must have been embarrassing for this man to walk around and be seen like this for hours, but it looks like his daughter took it in stride. No Subway sandwich for us today! Speaking of fast food, a word of advice: never mess with the pizza delivery guy.

Remember Demon Sheep? Now we've got Bobblehead.

Even if you're not a South Park fan, the latest episode really hit it on the head about Facebook and Chatroulette. Find an extra 20 minutes to watch and tell your boss it's for online media research... you tech savvy, social media expert, you!

Out on the Town

There is a LOT going down this weekend! Feels like we say that every weekend, doesn't it? But seriously: the Sakura Matsuri Street Festival, Yuri's Night, family festivals at The Corcoran and the Spy Museum... you are hereby commanded to go have some fun!

So you want to be a reality show STAR? Now is your chance! Auditions for Big Brother are going on Saturday at 1 p.m. in Adams Morgan. If, however, you win the grand prize, you are hereby obligated to take Queenie out for dinner. Go!

Queenie won't be home this weekend; she'll be dancing it up at her birthday party (and would also love to check the Done&Done concert over at All Souls on Saturday). But she MUST promote this lovely profile of Old Town done by We Love DC. Here's hoping it convinces you to hop across the river and take a visit! Also out in Queenie's home state, the Impact 2010 arts marathon is in full swing at GMU, so get some culture if you're in the 'burbs.


We're definitely feeling the love around here lately! Thank you for so many awesome birthday wishes, and thank you for staying with us!

See you next Friday,