Friday, January 22, 2010

The TR: I Voted for Change and All I Got was this Lousy T-Shirt

My poor, poor lords and ladies... please don't cry. We know this has been a terrible, terrible week, and you've all just been racked with sobs when you turn on the TV and hear even more bad news for Dems. But take hope! If there's one thing we're good at, it's being the underdog, and maybe with a little change in our mindset (and, oh, I don't know, growing a pair) we can get that team spirit back! Right? It's either that or learn to speak "Teabagger."

Forecast

It's official! President Obama's state of the union address will be next Wednesday (with rebuttal by none other than VA Guv'nah Mickey D), and no doubt Barry will be discussing Haiti and America's response to the crisis. What else will be on his mind? Oh, not much... we're thinking health care reform, his next golf game, taking on the banking industry, and jobs, lunch, Afghanistan and Iraq... AND his aides have already confirmed that he'll wade into deficit-talk... and oh, hey, this nutjob campaign finance reform BS... (but that little thing is just tangential, right?)...

OMG WRONG. People have been pretty much sounding the death-knell on Twitter and our other much-beloved social networks since the Supreme Court decided to allow corporations to freely finance political campaigns. Yeah, yeah, free speech, but SERIOUSLY?! We'll let the eloquent words of our Western Office Director speak for us: "In my mind it is the most disturbing political development to happen in a long time. Essentially means our elected officials might as well have corporate logos stamped onto their foreheads. Instead of the Senator from the Great State of New York -- it will be the Senator from the Great Tower of AIG."

Despite all this, the health care "reform" debate will continue (Barry will address this in Ohio today), and a compromise will eventually be agreed upon - be it a bill or a cancellation of the whole damn thing. But with Brown's victory, and fearful incumbents, there probably won't be much left to reform in pending legislation. Is this reconciliation time?

The peacock says adios (or is it the other way around?): Conan has been released by NBC to pursue future endeavors, and his last show will be tonight. But don't fear for Coco! He (and his staff) are rumored to be making big bucks on his way out, and he is so hot right now that he's getting offers left and right. As for Jay (who will be hosting nerdprom this year), he returns in March, and with all the bad press around this whole debacle, we're sort of betting that it'll be flop-tastic.

The NY Times wants to charge for content, and, in a ballsy move, is doing it in 2011. And this weekend YouTube will be entering the world of paid content, charging for viewing Sundance movies online. Look, you can yap away about free content all you want, but go check your bank statement and let me know how much you paid Apple for some songs and that episode of LOST you missed. Somebody somewhere WILL pay, and that's what these people are counting on. That or you using your digital piracy skillz.

The Week That Was

Last week's earthquake that devastated Haiti is still on everyone's minds, and we have seen the tremendous generosity of so many help rebuild the island nation. But, as you can guess, there is a huge need for security forces, sanitation and even more money. You still have plenty of opportunities to help (including wearing this hip t-shirt), and you can read Obama's editorial about what America can and needs to do in the aftermath if you need some inspiration. And please... ignore the idiots.

Back home, (the following link is NSFW, but that just means you'll click it real quick and then delete your browsing history, so whatever, go for it) model-turned-Senator-elect Scott Brown was the winner of Tuesday's special election to fill the seat of the late Senator Ted Kennedy and will be sworn in. There was a resounding yell of fury from everyone who was deluded into thinking he wouldn't win (seriously, y'all -- Queenie called this a week before it happened). But even more interesting were the numbers: FOX viewership exploded the day of, while CNN, MSNBC and others lagged harder than Jay Leno. Remember what Queenie said about rallying Teabaggers?

Even before the election, Democratic leaders were forming a circular firing squad, blaming each other for a train that had left the rails. This case study should be a warning for things to come in the fall: NEVER fall asleep at the wheel. The six week nap between Martha’s primary victory and Tuesday’s election proved to be disastrous, but hopefully a lesson. Take out your frustration however you like.

In other news, we were all like DUH and John Edwards was like, “LOL! No, seriously,” and then we were like *sigh.* Johnny, now there’s no going back. Good luck trying to salvage some good karma in Haiti, bro.

Today is Blog for Choice day around the Internet (yay!), yet Queenie has been in hiding from the pro-life marchers hanging around town (eek!). Except... wait... VIRTUAL MARCH?! She’ll keep the rest of her comments about this to herself, but had to share this story about new requirements for women to paint their nurseries and buy baby toys before they are allowed to have an abortion. Scariest part? That’s not that far from the truth.

Interweb Tomfoolery

This is a great way to leave your mark on a campaign contribution. Anonymous sincerity is best.

Heidi Montag’s new (gross, icky, transfigured, frightening) face after a ridiculous number of plastic surgeries is making everyone squeamish. $10 says you type her name in Google and search for more pics in 3... 2...

Everyone uses electronics, but here is a great way to see how your companies rate on a green scale. It’s not difficult to see how so many people own electronics designed and built by "bad" manufacturers. Queenie should be ashamed of the computer she is using to type this!

Our new favorite Twitter account: you know the Microsoft Office paper clip? Yeah, he’s wasted, and he would like to talk to you.

Another Martha goes down...

Commonly used slang terms with awesome origins. Impress someone at Happy Hour!

SPACE TWEETS.

A Coco Reqiuem -- before his last episode, five great moments. Thank you, Internet.

Sometimes Queenie makes popular culture references to rap songs or other such notable musical trends. Here is a handy website that will translate this newfangled musicality for the luddites among us (and we say that with love, Grandma!).

Another GOP fail. AND, ironically, a GOP win!

Scorecard

Look, cheer up! Didja miss the Jersey Shore kids last week? You have another chance Feb. 12 at the Shadow Room with DJ Pauly D. Stop pretending you don’t watch this show, will you? Queenie knows better! However, who is MORE awesome: Pauly D or Mary J. Blige, who will be honored at Marvin on Monday? (How’s that for some fancy alliteration?) Finally, Kathy Griffin is here, and Queenie LOVED her last show at the Kennedy Center, so it’s highly recommended.

Take a Xanax (or a nap, at least) and get ready to grin and bear it. Queenie is counting on you to stay the course!

Have a wonderful week and see you next Friday!

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