Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Special to the TR: Queenie's "Keeping It Real" SOTU Drinking Game

There are quite the plethora of drinking games and watch parties going on for Barry's lil ol' speech tonight. We've been getting links to them all over the place!

The Huffington Post is a popular choice.

Best line: "When Obama says 'Let me be clear, change isn't easy, make no mistake,' he's screwing with you to get you drunk, so five shots."

This looks a little more official.

Best line: The Republican Response Bonus Game. If the Guv'nah "refers to VA's long history of fighting for 'states' rights,' toss one back "after shouting, 'The South will rise again!'"

Asylum's SOTU Drinking Game looks good -- a little more structured, anyway.

Best line: "Players: In the interest of bi-partisanship, Republicans and Democrats play by the same rules, and independents are the designated drivers. Sorry, you should have made up your minds by now. Democrats will take up a collection to buy all the booze, plus to pay for the booze the Republicans agreed to pay for under Bush, but didn't actually end up paying for. Republicans must complain and bring boxes of tea bags.

This one out of San Francisco actually looks really fun.

Best line: "As soon as Mister Obama starts a defense of Cap & Trade, everybody must drink a whole beer then throw the empty can at the television. If anybody hits Harry Reid in the head, everyone else has to drink 3 shots of beer."

Queenie thought to herself, "Well, these are funny and all, but do any of them really get to the heart of the matter? Do any of them capture what's really at stake here, for Obama and for [dramatic pause] ...America?"

So here's the deal, kiddos - we're gonna focus on the most important part of this speech. Queenie's game is one rule, and one rule only:

Every time Obama says "JOBS," take a shot.

And when you wake up tomorrow morning with a pounding headache and vague sense of hopelessness, imagine how Congress feels.

See you Friday, chickens!

PS: For bonus points, check out Hillary's one hour special airing right before the speech tonight and take a shot every time you feel a hint of bitterness.

PPS: You know, on second thought, never mind. Wouldn't want you to end up in the hospital or anything.

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